Win a Wurfelbecher? LAST HOURS to enter our HABA Dice Dome contest

Until 11:59 (CDT) tonight, we'll be accepting entries to win a discontinued HABA dice tumbler.

Walking On Eggshells: Family Life as a Grown-Up

When Broadway Books offered me a review copy of Walking on Eggshells: Navigating the Delicate Relationship Between Adult Children and Parents, I thought, "Wow, that's a long way down the road, isn't it?"

The immediate applicability became apparent when I read a summary of some situations the book discusses:

If your grown daughter still winces at your tone of voice—even though she is thirty years old, or if you can’t get your adult son to return your phone calls, if you love your parents but find it impossible to visit them for more than three days without blowing up, or if you can only stand a couple of minutes on the phone with them.

Um, yeah. I guess adult children can read this too...

And it turns out that when we do what we can to improve our adult relationships with our own parents, we're paving the way to understanding and respecting our kids when they're adults.

Author Jane Isay, a former publishing executive, writes engagingly on the overlooked subject of parent relationships after a child comes of age. A natural story-teller, she shares information gleaned from extensive interviews with parents and adult children (ranging in ages from 25 to 70). In her professional background as an editor she "was persuaded that stories are the best teachers."

For all the books there are on baby and child rearing, our society has almost no discussion of how to navigate the parent-adult child relationship. When our kids are grown, we will still be their parents, but obviously we can't treat them as do now or as we will when they're high school. At some point, we're supposed to transition from actively intervening participants in our kids' lives to a position of greater observance.

Her book offers honest discussion of the things that antagonize adult parent-child relationships (issues like money, control, respect, changes in family structure, past grievances, in-laws, step-families, and holidays).

Most encouragingly, her stories underscore a deep love on the part of both parents and children even in conflict. Much of the conflict between parents and adult children is based on frustration in achieving desired affection, respect, acceptance, and understanding. Then guilt piles up on those failures which can paralyze all parties- through frustration or fear of having actions misinterpreted.

By telling the stories of numerous families, Jane Isay presents scenarios that are familiar and thought provoking. She doesn't offer the panacea of a bullet-point plan of action for a perfect relationship, but instead makes the reader contemplate communication systems within families. The ability to observe the inner-workings of other families lets the reader contemplate their own with greater distance and perspective.

For more information on the book and Jane Isay visit the book's website.

WIN a copy of Walking on Eggshells!
Broadway Books has given us 5 paperback copies of Walking on Eggshells to give away to Baby Toolkit readers. Email babytoolkitcontests [at] gmail.com with the subject Eggshells to enter. One entry per household, please. Entries will accepted through 11:59 PM CDT March 9, 2008. Winners will be randomly selected. International entries will be accepted but prizes shipped abroad may take some time to arrive as they'll most likely be shipped ground and sea.

General disclaimers regarding contests on Baby Toolkit: we'll do our best but we can't guarantee the same efforts from the postal system. If a prize item were to be lost in the lost in the mail, we would take it as a message from a higher power that the situation was simply not meant to be (no compensation or replacement will be issued). One entry per household. We will use a random integer generator at random.org to determine winners. Jim, Adrienne, their parents, and Ranger are not eligible for this contest. We respect your privacy and will not use your personal information for any purpose beyond determining a winner and sending prizes. Prize value: $14.


*** This is the independent opinion of the geek parents at Baby Toolkit, (c) 2008. We accepted a paperback review copy of the book ($14 value) under no obligation. We regularly decline items for review. We received no compensation from and have no undisclosed relationship with Random House, Doubleday, Broadway Books, Flying Dolphin Press, Jane Isay or their affiliates. After we agreed to a review, Broadway Books arranged for 5 paperback copies for our readers which we will ship at our own expense.

Heads Above the Competition: Britax Car Seats 20% off at Amazon.

Ranger is a tall drink of water. His atypical height and skinny build wreak havoc on finding pants and car seats that fit.

Since our beloved Graco infant car seat, we've gone through a number of convertible car seats that really didn't merit particular mention. Ranger quickly exceeded their 40" to 43" height restrictions (remember that kids with long torsos can outgrow a seat before they hit the height total requirement).

We bought a Britax Regent (max height: 53") for our primary car (a Honda accord) and my mom's minivan (the cars he rides in most often and on long trips). We chose it for it's five point harness. Upon first inspection, it looked like it wouldn't fit in my car. With a lot of wrestling, we were able to get it in place. It's huge in our small car, but seems both indestructible and luxurious (we call it the recliner). It's much easier to install in a LATCH vehicle (like my mom's minivan).

For Jim's car (compact sedan) which Ranger rides in less frequently, we have a Britax Parkway (height limit: 60"). It's a compact booster that uses the car seat's belt instead of an attached harness. We like it, but feel it's one he will do better in when he's more mature. We have to be attentive that he doesn't try to slip his shoulder out from under the seat belt mid-trip. He's starting to understand that we want him to leave it alone, but it's much easier to use (and feel confident in) a five point harness at this young age (2.5 years).

If you're currently looking for a Britax seat, all Britax is on sale 20% off at Amazon through Sunday, March 2nd.

Come on in My Kitchen: Win a Copy of Annabel Karmel's delicious Toddler Cookbook

It is easier for me to envision a cookbook for toddlers and maybe even one using toddlers as an ingredient than it is to imagine a guide to cooking with toddlers.

When DK offered to send me a review copy of Annabel Karmel's new Toddler Cookbook, I had a sneaking suspicion it was one of those "toddler" books truly geared for age 5 and up. I am rarely so pleased to be proven wrong.

Although not every step of every recipe is toddler-friendly, I readily found recipes that 2.5 year-old Ranger and I could work on together. Not only that, they were recipes we might actually enjoy eating.

While some recipes include meat (chicken satay skewers, lettuce boats with chicken, salmon fishcakes, and chicken dippers), vegetarians won't feel excluded (pita pizzas, corn quesadillas, cherry tomato sauce, and mini Caesar salad with homemade croutons). There are also 10 snack, drink, and dessert recipes.

The book is well-illustrated with great photographs showing kids enacting EACH STEP of the recipe. Clear bowls prevent obstructions and everyone's hand seems magically out of the way throughout. Ranger loved seeing kids cooking, and the photos helped him see himself in the unfamiliar role of cook.

The strong visuals gave me courage to tackle meringues for Valentine's Day (while Ranger was taking a nap). I was tempted to stop there and proclaim the recipes easy and delicious, but deep in my heart I knew only a toddler-tested recipe would do.

Tonight we made mini banana muffins. The author calls for whole wheat flour which is a pleasant departure from stereotypical kid fare. Ranger and Jim were the mixmasters. They mashed a banana (which Ranger seemed to feel kind of guilty about), mixed ingredients, and then (drumroll, please) sifted in the dry ingredients. It turns out that while Ranger likes mixing, he loves sifting with my old school rotary sifter (which I need to upgrade to one without a loose handle). If we get homebound by another ice storm, I am breaking out all the flour and sugar and setting up a toddler-powered home grist mill.

We all had a great time, and I'm starting to realize how toddler Ranger can participate in the kitchen activity without risk of injury or meltdown. And the muffins, well...

even extraordinarily picky Ranger couldn't keep his hands off them.

Which is how I feel about the Toddler Cookbook (list price $10.99, $8.79 at Amazon).

WIN A COPY!
Thanks to the kind folks at DK, five Baby Toolkit readers (with U.S. addresses only) will win copies of the delicious Toddler Cookbook. To enter this random drawing, email babytoolkitcontests(at)gmail.com with the subject: Toddler Cookbook. Entries will be accepted through 11:59 PM CDT, 3/9/2008.

General disclaimers regarding contests on Baby Toolkit: we'll do our best but we can't guarantee the same efforts from the postal system. If a prize item were to be lost in the lost in the mail, we would take it as a message from a higher power that the situation was simply not meant to be (no compensation or replacement will be issued). One entry per household. We will use a random integer generator at random.org to determine a winner. Jim, Adrienne, their parents, and Ranger are not eligible for this contest. We respect your privacy and will not use your personal information for any purpose beyond determining a winner and sending prizes.

Good luck, we really think you're going to love this great book!

***This is the independent opinion of the geek family at Baby Toolkit, (c) 2008. We accepted a free review copy of the book, but under no obligation. We wouldn't write about it if we didn't like; we regularly decline reviews. We receive no compensation from DK or its affiliates for this review (though they are supplying and shipping the contest prizes). We do like DK as their travel books (including Rough Guide) and Eyewitness books have been household favorites as long as we've been a household.